A Balanced Approach: Compassion

I recently did a mantra meditation with davidji centred around awakening compassion. It made me pause and reflect — and inspired my latest mantra post on my socials: I am compassionate. But it raised an important question for me: when we use a mantra like I am compassionate, do we instinctively think of compassion towards others — or towards ourselves?

Many of us are incredibly compassionate towards others, especially when family, friends, or colleagues are going through a difficult time. Yet we often don’t extend the same level of compassion, understanding, or kindness to ourselves. Can you relate?

Compassion in Our Relationships

Compassion is such an important component when interacting with others and supports harmonious relationships. It brings a lot of benefit to the receiver and to the giver. It cultivates patience, nurtures acceptance and tolerance, and helps ease strong emotions such as anger, bitterness or resentment that can arise when we overgive — especially when we don’t realise we’re doing it.

Compassion also supports emotional steadiness and nervous system regulation, helping us stay grounded and connected to ourselves.

However, self‑compassion is equally important, for the same reasons and many more.

Realising the Value of Self-Compassion

Pause for a moment and ask yourself: How compassionate am I with myself?

After working with hundreds of clients over more than eleven years, I’ve noticed that when the theme of compassion shows up in a session, it is almost always about creating awareness of compassion towards Self (the same is true for forgiveness).

Compassion begins with how we speak to ourselves.

I see it in clinic every day. Many clients are deeply compassionate with others — sometimes to the point where it becomes detrimental to their own wellbeing, energy levels, and boundaries.

When Compassion Becomes Out of Balance

When compassion is unevenly directed, it can show up in different ways in daily life.

We may:

Allow it to affect our personal boundaries, saying yes too often instead of no
Give in to people‑pleasing tendencies
Overcommit ourselves, adding to stress and busy schedules
Lose our own energy by giving too much, leaving us drained and fatigued
Forget about ourselves and our own needs, putting them on the backburner
Choose caring for others over self‑care, leaving us feeling off‑centre
Be overly critical of ourselves
Speak to ourselves in ways we’d never speak to someone we love.

Perhaps you recognise some of these — or something similar.

I’m not saying stop being compassionate towards others. I am shining light on a potential imbalance and encouraging a more mindful and balanced approach, especially if the above resonates strongly with you.

Self‑Compassion Awareness: Reflective Prompts

If you’d like to explore how you can create more self‑compassion in your daily life, these gentle reflections can offer a supportive starting point. You may choose to reflect on them in a way that feels natural for you — perhaps through writing, or by intentionally paying attention to what comes up for you during the day.

How compassionate am I with myself, truly?
Do I offer myself the same understanding and patience I extend to others?
What would it feel like if I offered myself that same understanding?
Where may I be overgiving — and what impact does that have on my energy, boundaries, or emotions?
How can I speak to myself more kindly, especially when negative self‑talk or critical thoughts arise?
What would a more balanced, mindful expression of compassion look like for me right now?

Take your time with these. Even a small shift in awareness can create meaningful change.

Using Mantras for Self‑Compassion

Mantras can be a powerful way to interrupt old thought processes or programs and gently create new pathways. They help soften self‑criticism, shift the internal dialogue, and support a more compassionate relationship with yourself.

A simple mantra you may like to work with is: I am compassionate with myself.

It’s a gentle reminder that compassion isn’t only something you offer outwardly — it’s something you can cultivate inwardly, too.

If you’d like to explore the power of mantras more deeply, you’ll find a dedicated article in the resources section below. And if mantra meditation interests you — the practice that finally helped me build a consistent daily routine — you can read more in Create Space for Stillness, also linked below.

You’ll also find regular mantra posts on my social channels as gentle prompts to pause and reconnect. You’re welcome to join me on Instagram or Facebook.

Awakening Compassion – Sanskrit Mantra

If you’re drawn to Sanskrit mantras, chanting, or mantra meditation, here is the Tara Mantra that davidji used in the meditation that inspired this article. It honours Green Tara, the Goddess of Compassion (the colour green also connects to the heart chakra).

Om Tare Tuttare Ture Soha.

davidji describes the meaning as follows:

Om – represents Tara’s sacred, enlightened body and the oneness that exists
Tare – liberating from all suffering
Tuttare – liberating from the eight (spiritual) fears (ignorance, pride, anger, jealousy, wrong thinking, greed, desire and attachment, and doubt)
Ture – liberation from the separation
Soha – may the mantra take root in me; ‘make it so’.

Support through Kinesiology

Kinesiology is a gentle and effective way to create awareness and clarity around the attitudes, beliefs or thought processes that may make self‑compassion difficult. If you find yourself struggling with boundary setting, over‑analysing, feeling emotionally overwhelmed, or having difficulty recognising your own needs, Kinesiology can help you understand what’s sitting underneath.

Through Advanced Kinesiology techniques, we can, together, identify the subconscious stressors that contribute to these patterns and develop a tailored support strategy you can use between sessions. If you’d like guidance or feel you need support, please email me or book online.

With inspiration & compassion,

Lexi

Sources

This article was inspired by a meditation and newsletter from davidji, whose teachings on compassion and mantra practice continue to be a grounding influence in my work. You’ll find the Tara Mantra and its meaning shared throughout his resources and guided meditations.